During a recent client session, the client was lamenting how challenging it is to figure out all the details for her new company. She is still in the dreaming stage, and it seems as if she is hitting the wall and things are much more difficult than they need to be. I asked her to back it up a bit.
Usually, when people start a project, they very often jump into figuring it out. They may even start with what “it looks like.” However, the starting point is to identify the feeling of the project running smoothly and everything working. After all, we do things for the feelings they give us.
Think of it this way, you have a choice of two sweatshirts. One is rough and stiff, while the other is soft and cuddly. If you’re looking for the feeling of being wrapped in a big hug, you may choose the soft and cuddly sweatshirt. However, if your mom gave you the rough and stiff one (perhaps it’s rough and stiff because of repeated washings) and you are missing her hugs, you may choose the one that reminds you of her. The choice is yours. Choose what works.
With any new project (including a business), if you know what the feeling is that you are going for, then it will be easy to fill in all the stuff you were trying to figure out before without having to “figure it out.” In fact, if you know the feeling you will have, then you can start to make choices that will give you that feeling right away. In this way, your new project will become one way that you are able to have that feeling. And as for the figuring it out part, the choices become more obvious.
Another hint about the feeling: make it a body sensation. The body responds to a body sensation, and it is much more memorable than just words. For example, the client started with the feeling of joy. This sounds great. However, it’s just a word.
Then we dug deeper and imagined being an athlete in the zone. The body sensation is of flow, expansion, and everything clicking. Feel this in your body. Shoulders are down. Stomach is relaxed. You are totally present in the moment and the next moment is unfolding with ease. Imagine going down a river in a boat and you are easily going around any obstacle. Or imagine you are racing in a really great car and as you round the corner, the tires are hugging the track. Or imagine being totally absorbed in something, the time just flies by and when you look at your watch you sit back with a sense of satisfaction.
And that is what we did. She imagined what the company would feel like after it was up and running and successful. She started to feel the flow of being in the zone. From here every choice she makes is either leading to or supporting this feeling. It doesn’t matter if she is choosing how to style her hair, interacting with her boyfriend, or choosing her company logo. The feeling is the same – the ease of being in the zone.
Give it a try.
An interesting thing happens. Your experiences and choices start to line up to match that feeling. So, by the end of the day, you are very likely to have the feeling you set out to experience.
It’s that simple. Once you know what you are aiming for (the feeling), the choices will fall into place with greater ease. You are the person living your life. You get to choose. Choose what works for you.