Tribal Influence

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Tribal InfluenceDoes your tribe support a life that works for you? If not, it may be time for a change.

We are tribal beings. This means that we are a part of a group. It’s a basic survival instinct. Think of the time of the cavemen (and cavewomen). Their survival literally depended upon getting along and helping each other. This included hunting (food), weaving (business), telling stories (communicating), hugging (physical touch), and more.

In today’s world, people are feeling stressed because they are isolated from their tribe – their friends, family and co-workers. Or the opposite may be true. They are around their tribe (family) too much.

In my own life, my husband likes to watch the news and all the doom and gloom. I’m the opposite. So, I focus my time and energy on feeling better and better and have created a tribe that supports this and have created a life that works for me.

(By the way, at the end of the day, my husband and I sit down for a debrief to share what we have learned and experienced. He knows how I feel and can usually condense the news into five minutes. Much better than all day, and he feels heard.)

Is it working for you? Or isn’t it?

You get to choose how you would like to think, feel and act. The world isn’t happening to you. You are creating your experiences based upon what you think, feel and do about the events that present themselves.

There is no right or wrong, good or bad. It’s about doing what works for you. Just because you have one tribe, doesn’t mean that you have to stay with that tribe. This is your opportunity to find a tribe that works for you.

In every adversity is an opportunity. A now opportunity is to reevaluate how you would like to feel and who will support that. You get to choose your tribe.

Did you know that the five people you hang around with the most will influence your thoughts, feelings and actions? This will also influence the outcomes and experiences that you have. Take a look at the five people you spend time with. Are they focused on solutions and possibilities or “the world is coming to an end”? Whatever their focus is, chances are that yours is similar.

How do you create a tribe that works for you and supports a life that works for you?

Begin by knowing what it is you want. A life that works for you. A tribe that supports this is one way to create this desire.

Then, choose the feeling you’d like to have when you have a life and tribe that works for you. Start feeling it now and begin doing things that match that feeling. Base what you do on how you would like to feel.

As you expand your feelings, opportunities will present themselves to you. Let’s say you are reading a book that has you feeling so good that you feel inspired to reach out to the author and tell him the impact his writing has on you and how grateful you are. You just made a contact that can grow into something more. (And did you notice the gratitude? That will always help you feel better.)

Then you reach out to someone else who might like the book. They call to thank you and you end up discussing the book. And by the way, they have a book that you might like. This person happens to mention that he has another friend who might be interested in the book. You have the beginnings of a book club focused on positive writings, inspirational stories, or adventure tales of overcoming something.

And maybe the author would be happy to talk with your book club (by Zoom). In fact, you may be onto something, record the Zoom talks and create a library of sorts that you share with the world. And it grows from there.

In short:

  • Know your desire.
  • Choose how you would like to feel.
  • Do something to support that feeling.
  • Follow the inspired actions that will support that feeling.
  • Check in with yourself. Is this working for you? If so, continue. If not, make a different choice.
  • Repeat.

It’s all about what works for you. Does your tribe contribute? If not, you have a chance to make a different choice and create a new tribe leading to a life that works for you.

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